A Veiled Chick’s Outbursts comprise writings of a more personal nature about my experiences or issues that exasperate me be it something I heard, read, watched, witnessed or observed. It is my way of letting off some steam, my incensed breathings.
I HAD MY FILL
Facebook is like jail, you sit around and waste time, write on walls, and get poked by people you don’t know.
The 21st Century is an inexorable “social” networking world, with an escalating compulsive need for popularity, a deficiency in mental stimulus, an increase in short attention spans, a decrease in memory retention, monotony in almost everything, and a decline in principles, priorities and responsibilities.
Facebook exemplifies all the above and more, and I opt not to be a part of this.
Using “friend” sheds a strong light on the founder of Facebook as well as the illusory concept of what friend and social now mean.
Facebook’s definition is this: a one-sided substance-deficient “sociality” by doing social without being social.
The following do not classify as friends: random people from our past, strangers and well-known personalities, some of whom were rather boring, I ended up “unfriending” to keep a positive image of them in my mind – knowing less about some people, be they personal, strangers or famous, is sometimes a blessing.
Just because we happen to be a Facebook connexion, does not equate to being friends.
Friendship is a two-way effort.
WEARY OF WHAT IS SHARED
Three things you must always ask yourself before you say anything: Does this need to be said? Does this need to be said by me? Does this need to be said by me now?
~ Craig Ferguson
There are timelines with too much “information” or inanities in the form of links, photos and statuses inundating feedback walls. Many illustrated paltriness is universal, and its antonym is not.
Post, for instance, a video of a kitten chasing its tail (awh, how cute!) and watch the number of likes rise. Post a human rights story . . . well, you get my point . . . unless the injustice is posted by or about a famed figure.
People sharing private photos without permission, and when you politely ask for their removal, you receive a slew of verbal attacks as a response. They betrayed a silent trust, but you are the one in the wrong, what nerve! A friend of mine had to change her Facebook name to avoid certain friends from finding her. She dared to ask someone she considered a friend of many years to remove her photo, which she shared without her consent, and received a crazy barrage of words and losing a friendship she thought was strong.
The plethora of hasty, absurd and unintelligent comments some make, on the defence over nothing to justify their wrongdoing. Sadly, it only results in them disclosing their lack of judgement and knowledge, and insecurities, unawares.
The increasing number of groups we join and pages we like, for what? They are essentially meaningless except for maybe to compensate for something we are lacking or to make us feel good. If you are proud to be a Muslim, UPHOLD, LIVE and BREATHE Al-Islâm as a (healing) way of life by BEING a Muslim, instead of hiding behind a page; if you are against Palestinian oppression, boycott resources sanctioning the annexation of Palestine rather than feigning support by joining groups; etc.
INVALUABLE TIME IS ANOTHER REASON +
There are the obvious and common reasons for closing the account like unethical practises, privacy, (though one will have to be rather naïve to expect privacy when using the web let alone a baseless “social” network), terms of conditions, “addiction”, the sudden deactivating of specific accounts, the owner (a major factor in my decision for closing my account), studies proving the negative impact and “side effects” of Facebook, etc.
But the ultimate reason, life is too valuable to waste away on the unnecessary. I value my time and I will be held accountable for it and the energy expended, and it is simply not worth it.
Adding to the above, I honestly cannot be bothered with:
- Unwanted invites for shallow purposes and improper messages from the opposite gender.
- Negative, injudicious and childish drivels from people (with unresolved issues) who misread posts, messages or comments with ill-intentioned hearts and narrow minds; abnormally sensitive Facebookers who take everything personally; and the bore of similar statuses and links shared by many.
- “Contacts” who want my professional services and expertise free of charge and, get this, some take offence when I refuse their ever so generous offer.
- Superfluous words, hollow promises and insincere praises (about my writings) from people I personally know. Naturally, I never believed their words to begin with but my level of respect for them did wane.
The penultimate reason, Facebookers who are quick to click the “like” button without reading my posts. How do I know this? My personal website and Scribd account show the statistics of the number of visitors, views and countries. Some “likers’” countries never seem to appear, hmm! (Why do I think the same will happen with this outburst?)
One main worthy cause – the most appalling and riling – implanted the initial thought to terminate my account: certain Facebookers let an injustice exist opting instead for cravenness.
I am referring to the murder of Ali Al-Jāber رحمه الله.
My husband, Khalid AlMahmoud, wrote three articles about his friend and colleague. Following (futile) advice from “friends”, he opened a Facebook account to spread the word. To our dismay, which we, alas, expected, Facebook made us realise pusillanimity was a common factor amongst the martyr’s colleagues, family and friends. A very small number even bothered to share the articles let alone do something about it!
I could not care less for gaining followers, being a number in an ever-increasing “friends” list or for the number of “likes” my works receive, if not genuine. By God, there is enough disingenuity in the world I do not need it in my life.
I did come across the odd decent person on Facebook and a few childhood friends from my time in Manchester and London, exchanging emails and numbers, and I admit, it is – was – a great source for writing ideas, but that is all.
People I revere, I prefer to sign up for their newsletters or subscribe to their websites; I actively do something beneficial about a worthy cause; I read, listen to and watch credible sources for the latest updates concerning what is happening in the world; I allocate time to connect or reconnect with family and friends; and so forth.
I survived before the contagious existence of Facebook and I will survive without it.
As with every book, it has a beginning, middle and an end, and my Facebook ending is nigh.
Sayonara Facebook for I close the book on you forever الْحَمْدُ لله.
Social media demands a lot of us on top of our already demanding lives. So let’s disconnect as we need to and renew our interest and ourselves.
~ Simon Mainwaring